Kids

Lyn Blue

Sat, 08/08/2009 - 11:28

Cassie asked me tonight if I thought we'd have kids. Well, first we have to have sex, but I didn't mention that. One of the reasons I don't think I'll have kids (besides my obvious fate) is because I can't imagine their contribution to my life. Sure, when I'm with her, hers are sweet. they hug & kiss on me... for brief moments I think of my log and I being able to hang out with them like that... "do the kid thing" but then I leave - and just like that - it goes away. What's wrong with me???!!! To make matters worse, every year when I go in for my "womanly exam" my OBGYN asks me if I'm on birth control... if I'm thinking about having kids soon... and you should SEE the look on his face when he learns we're not even trying!!!... it's so confused... he can't believe that I'm in my late 20's and not considering it yet. I mean, what else am I going to do with my life? That's unheard of in these necks of the woods. But the MOST TERRIBLE part about all this is that I really DON'T KNOW what I'm going to do with my life... someone once told me that that was our job on earth - to procreate. well, what about all the sickos? should they procreate too? crack babies ailing around because mommy was a dope head... or wealthy kids that end up in prison because they don't know what to do with themselves. I can't think that that's all there is...

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